"PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: DEAD MEN TELL NO TALES" (2017) ReviewI have a confession to make. When the Disney Studios had released the fourth movie in the "PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN"franchise, I wished they had never done it. I wished that a fourth film had never been made. I also believed that the franchise was fine after three movies. Then I learned that a fifth film was scheduled to be released this summer and . . . yeah, I was not pleased by the news. But considering that I can be such a whore for summer blockbusters, I knew that I would be watching it. Directed by Joachim Rønning and Espen Sandberg, "PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: DEAD MEN TELL NO TALES" seemed to be a story about the search for the trident of the sea god Poseidon. Two years after the post-credit scene from 2007's "PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: AT WORLD'S END", Henry Turner, the son of Will Turner and Elizabeth Swann Turner boards the Flying Dutchman to inform his father of his discovery that the mythical Trident of Poseidon is able to break the Flying Dutchman's curse and free him from his ship. Henry plans to seek Jack Sparrow's help to find it. Will does not believe the Trident exists and orders Henry to leave his ship and stay away from Jack. Nine years later, Henry finds himself serving aboard a British Royal Navy warship as a seaman. He realizes the ship is sailing into the Devil's Triangle. The captain dismisses his concerns and has Henry locked up for attempting a mutiny. Upon entering the Triangle, the ship's crew discovers a shipwreck that belongs to a Spanish Navy officer named Captain Armando Salazar and his crew, who had become part of the undead after being lured into the Triangle. Salazar and his crew slaughter everyone on board the warship, except for Henry. Discovering that Henry is searching for Jack, Salazar instructs Henry to tell Jack that death is coming his way. Some twenty to thirty years earlier, Salazar was a notorious pirate hunter who had been lured into the Triangle and killed by Jack, who was the young captain of the Wicked Wench at the time. Due to the Triangle's magic, Salazar and his crew became part of the undead. Years later, a young woman named Carina Smyth is about to be executed for witchcraft on the British-held island of Saint Martin, due to her knowledge of astronomy and horology. She is also interested in finding the Trident, for she sees it as a clue to her parentage. During a prison break, she gets caught up in an attempt by Jack and his small crew, which includes Joshamee Gibbs and Scrum (from the fourth film), to steal a bank vault on the island of Saint Martin. Jack is abandoned by his crew when the vault turns up empty. Desolate, he gives up his magical compass for a drink at a tavern and unexpectedly frees Salazar and his crew from the Triangle. He is also captured by the British Army. Carina meets Henry, who is awaiting execution for what happened aboard his ship. Both realize that for different reasons, they are searching for Poseidon's Trident. Henry escapes, but Carina finds herself a prisoner again. Henry arranges both hers and Jack's escape from execution. Jack also becomes interested in finding the Trident, for he hopes to use it free himself from Salazar's wrath.I once came upon an article that complained about the lack of consistency in the "PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN" franchise. When I first heard about this movie, I must admit that I was annoyed to learn that Will Turner would still be entrapped by the Flying Dutchman curse after the post-credit scene from "AT WORLD'S END". I realize that the Disney suits had believed that Will was permanently trapped by the Flying Dutchman curse, but I thought that Terry Rossio and Ted Elliott's claim - that Elizabeth's ten year wait - had broken the curse. Apparently I was wrong . . . and annoyed at the same time. But Will's situation was a mere annoyance for me. The situation regarding Jack's compass - you know, the one that directs a person to one's heart desire - really annoyed me. According to the 2006 movie, "PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: DEAD MAN'S CHEST", Jack had first acquired the compass from Vodou priestess Tia Dalma aka the goddess Calypso. Yet, according to a flashback in this movie, Jack was given the compass from his dying captain, during the Wicked Wench's encounter with Captain Salazar. What else is there to say, but . . . blooper.Another matter that annoyed me was the setting for the protagonists' final battle against Captain Salazar and his crew. I wish I could explain it. I believe that the setting was located . . . underwater, thanks to the mysterious stone that Carina Smyth had inherited from her parents. I simply found it murky and unsatisfying. And I wish that final conflict had been set elsewhere. I have one last complaint. The movie's post-credit scene featured a character's dream of former antagonist Captain Davy Jones in shadow form. The character had awaken, but the scene's last shot focused on puddles of water and a few bits of tentacles. Was this the franchise's way of hinting the return of Davy Jones? I hope not. Captain Jones was a great villain, but two movies featuring his character were enough. The last thing I want to see in another film is the return of the Flying Dutchman curse or Jones.Yes, "PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: DEAD MEN TELL NO TALES" has its flaws. But it also had plenty of virtues that made me enjoy the film. One of the aspects of the film that I enjoyed was the story written by Jeff Nathanson and Terry Rossio. Old "ghosts"from the past have always played a role in the plots from the franchise's past four films. But the past played a major, major role in this film for not only Jack Sparrow, but also four other characters - Henry Turner, Carina Smyth, Hector Barbossa and even Captain Armando Salazar. I found the story between Jack and Captain Salazar rather ironic, considering that the latter proved to be the franchise's first villain to seek personal revenge against the former. For the other three, I found their stories rather poignant in the end. And because of this, I found "DEAD MEN TELL NO TALES" to be the most emotionally satisfying entry in the franchise. This proved to be the only PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN film in which I broke into tears at least three times. Poignant or not, the franchise's trademark humor and action were on full display in this movie. In fact, I can think of at least three major scenes that I believe effectively displayed both traits. One of them involved Jack and the Dying Gull (appropriate name for Jack's latest ship) crew's attempt to rob the new bank on Saint Martin. Not only did it lead to Carina's first escape from a hangman's noose, but also a merry chase that involved the Dying Gull's crew, the British Army, along with Jack and the banker's wife inside of a stolen vault. The second scene that had me both laughing and on edge involved Henry and the Dying Gull's successful rescue of Jack and Carina from being hanged. The third scene had me more on edge than laughing for it involved Jack, Henry and Carina's attempt to survive Salazar's attack upon their rowboat (ghost shark anyone?) as they headed for shore."DEAD MEN TELL NO TALES" featured the fourth major location for the movie franchise - Australia. Although I found it a pity that the movie did not use any of the Caribbean islands for filming locations, I must admit that production designer Nigel Phelps made great use of the Australian locale, especially in his creation of the Saint Martin town and the Turners' home. On the other hand, I found Paul Cameron's photography rather beautiful, colorful and sharp. I thought Roger Barton and Leigh Folsom Boyd's film editing was first-rate, especially in the action sequences that featured the bank vault chase, the rescue of Jack and Carina, and the shark attack. I wish I could say the same about the final action sequence, but I must admit that I was not that impressed.I was impressed by the performances featured in "DEAD MEN TELL NO TALES". The movie possessed a first-rate supporting cast that featured the return of Kevin R. McNally as Joshamee Gibbs, Stephen Graham as Scrum, Martin Klebba as Marty, Angus Barnett as Mullroy and Giles New as Murtogg. Scrum, who was last seen as part of Hector Barbossa's Queen Anne's Revenge crew, had decided to join Jack Sparrow's crew aboard the Dying Gull. And the presence of Marty, Mullroy and Murtogg revealed that Barbossa was not the only who had escaped Blackbeard's capture of the Black Pearl. The movie also revealed the return of Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightley as Will Turner and Elizabeth. Their final reunion near the end of the film proved to be one of the most emotionally satisfying and poignant moments in the entire franchise.There were other great supporting performances that caught my eye. One came from David Wenham, who was in fine, villainous form as Lieutenant John Scarfield, a very bigoted Royal Navy officer who was after Jack, Henry Turner and Carina Smyth. Golshifteh Farahani gave a rather interesting and strange performance as a witch named Shansa, whom many seafarers sought for advice. Adam Brown (from "THE HOBBIT" Trilogy) and Delroy Atkinson proved to be entertaining additions to Jack's crew and the franchise. Juan Carlos Vellido gave a rather intense performance as Captain Salazar's first officer, Lieutenant Lesaro. Since Keith Richards was unable to return as Jack's father, Captain Edward Teague, producer Jerry Brockheimer managed to cast former Beatles Paul McCartney as the former's brother and Jack's uncle, Jack Teague. And I did not know that McCartney was not only a first-rate actor, but one with great comic timing. I had been familiar with Brenton Thwaites' previous work in movies like "MALEFICENT" and "GODS OF EGYPT". But I was surprised by how much I enjoyed his portrayal of Will and Elizabeth's son, Henry Turner. Thwaites did an excellent job in combining the traits of Henry's parents, while making the character a complete individual on his own. Kaya Scodelario was equally effective as science enthusiast, Carina Smyth. Thanks to Scodelario's skillful performance, Carina was an intelligent and charismatic woman. The actress also had a strong screen chemistry with her co-star, Thwaites.But the three performances that stood above the others came from Geoffrey Rush, Javier Bardem and of course, Johnny Depp. It is hard to believe that Rush first portrayed Hector Barbossa as a slightly crude, yet cunning, cold-blooded and ambitious pirate. Thanks to Rush's superb portrayal, Barbossa still possessed those traits, but the latter had developed into a successful man, who also possessed a heartbreaking secret that he managed to keep close to his chest. I must admit that I did not particular care for Javier Bardem's portrayal as a Bond villain in 2012's "SKYFALL". I found it too hammy. Thankfully, Bardem's portrayal of the villainous Captain Armando Salazar seemed a great deal more skillful to me. Bardem's Armando Salazar was no mere over-the-top villain, but a vengeful wraith willing to use any method and form of manipulation to capture his prey. Someone once complained that Depp's Jack Sparrow seemed different or a ghost of his former self. I could not agree. Depp's Sparrow was just as selfish, manipulative, horny and humorous as ever. Yet, this Jack Sparrow was at least nineteen years older than he was in "PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: AT WORLD'S END". Despite having a miniaturized Black Pearl in his possession for several years, Jack has been forced to settle for a creaking tub called the Dying Gull and a small crew. Worse, he and his men have experienced a series of failures in their attempt to make that great score. If Jack seemed a bit different in this film, it is because he is older and not as successful as he would like to be. And Depp, being the superb actor that he is, did an excellent job in conveying Jack's current failures in his performance.Would I regard "PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: DEAD MEN TELL NO TALES" as my favorite film in the Disney franchise? Hmmm . . . no. The movie possessed one or two bloopers in regard to the franchise's main narrative. I was not that impressed by the watery setting for Jack and Salazar's final confrontation. And I did not care for the hint of a past villain's return in the film's post-credit scene. But I really enjoyed the excellent performances by a cast led by the always talented Johnny Depp and the first-rate direction of Joachim Rønning and Espen Sandberg. And I especially story created by Jeff Nathanson and Terry Rossio. Not only did it feature the usual hallmarks of a first-rate PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN film, for me it made "DEAD MEN TELL NO TALES" the most poignant and emotionally satisfying movie in the entire franchise.
"SKYFALL" (2012) Review
Before I had sat down in a movie theater to watch the latest James Bond movie, "SKYFALL", it occurred to me that four years had passed since the last movie about the MI-6 agent. During those four years, EON Productions endured another round of legal entanglements regarding the Bond franchise, delaying the production and release of "SKYFALL" by at least two years. But in the end, producers Barbara Broccoli and Michael G. Wilson came through and released the company's 23rd James Bond film.
"SKYFALL" begins in Istanbul, Turkey; where MI-6 agents James Bond and "Eve" go after a mercenary named Patrice, who has managed to steal a list of undercover NATO agents from the laptop hard drive of a MI-6 field agent. Their assignment ends in disaster after Patrice wounds Bond in the shoulder, and "Eve" accidentally shoots Bond, during his fight with the mercenary atop a moving train. Following the Istanbul debacle, "M" is pressured by Intelligence and Security Committee Chairman Gareth Mallory to retire. During M's return from her meeting, the MI-6 computer servers are breached, resulting in an explosion at the building that kills a number of employees. Bond, who had used his "death" to retire, returns to London and asks to return to the field. Despite his failure to pass a series of physical and psychological examinations, M allows Bond to find the person behind the theft of the list of NATO agents and the MI-6 explosions. Bond's investigations eventually leads him to a former MI-6 agent named Raoul Silva who wants to humiliate, discredit and ultimately kill M as revenge against her for betraying him years ago.
When I finally walked out of that movie theater, as the end credits for "SKYFALL" rolled, the first thought that came to my mind was that the movie was a piece of crap. I was very disappointed by "SKYFALL". The more I thought about the plot and characterizations featured in "SKYFALL", I finally realized that my feelings about the movie had not changed. I still believe it was a piece of crap and one of the worst James Bond movies I have ever seen.
There are certain aspects of "SKYFALL" that I found admirable. And before I delve into the reasons behind my dislike of the film, I might as point out these admirable traits. Unlike 2008's "QUANTUM OF SOLACE", "SKYFALL" was not marred by an uneven pacing. Directed Sam Mendes did an excellent job of giving the movie a steady pace that did not leave me breathless or groggy. I also have to give kudos to cinematographer Roger Deakins for his sharp, yet beautiful photography of the different locations featured in the film - especially for Istanbul, London and Scotland. And most of the action sequences in the movie - especially Raoul Silva's attack upon M at a public inquiry and the chase scene through London's Underground system - struck me as very exciting and well shot, thanks to Mendes' direction, along with Stuart and Kate Baird's editing.
Looking back on "SKYFALL", I noticed that it featured some first-rate acting, by a superb cast. Daniel Craig returned for a third time to portray 007. And as usual, he was in top form, capturing the British agent's self doubts after being shot in Istanbul. After seventeen years, Judi Dench portrayed "M" for the last time in a plot in which her character plays a major role in the story. Many have been speculating about an Academy Award for her excellent performance. The only reason I am not jumping on this bandwagon is that Dench has been knocking it out of the ballpark as "M", ever since she first assumed the role in 1995's "GOLDENEYE". Javier Bardeem seemed to have been inspired by Heath Ledger's Oscar winning performance as the Joker in his portrayal of Raoul Silva, a former MI-6 agent who seeks revenge against "M". In his way, the actor's performance was just as colorful. However, I do not think I will ever consider him to be one of my favorite Bond villains. I found his performance a little too showy and not very original for my tastes.
Naomie Harris was in fine form as MI-6 agent "Eve", who turned out to be the iconic Miss Moneypenny. I really enjoyed Harris' performance, but I have something to say about her transformation from field agent to secretary. Bérénice Marlohe did the best she could with the small role of Sévérine, a former victim of the sex trade who became Silva's representative and mistress. Ben Whishaw was a ball as a young and geeky "Q", who seemed more like a computer hacker, instead of an arms quartermaster. Both Ralph Fiennes and Rory Kinnear gave solid performances as Intelligence and Security Committee Chairman Gareth Mallory and Bill Tanner, "M"'s Chief of Staff. And Albert Finney gave a lively and entertaining performance as Kincade, the gamekeeper of the Skyfall estate that belongs to Bond.
But despite its positive attributes, in the end I found "SKYFALL" very disappointing. And I believe the movie's main problems could be found in the script written by Neal Purvis, Robert Wade and John Logan. The movie began in Istanbul with Bond and Moneypenny attempting to get their hands on the list of undercover NATO agents that had been stolen from another MI-6 agent. Unfortunately, the movie never explained how a field agent ended up with such a list on his laptop hard drive in the first place. Some fans have dismissed this plot hole, claiming it would have been unnecessary for the script to explain such a situation. I am sorry, but I refuse to dismiss it. For me, it does not make sense that a field agent stationed in Istanbul would have such a list in the first place. Only unusual circumstances could explain this situation . . . and the screenplay refused to do so.
The screenplay also failed to explain why Silva waited so long to go after the NATO agents on the list Patrice stole for him. A certain period of time had passed between the incident in Istanbul and the bombing at MI-6. What took Silva so long to go after those agents? And did "M" or the British government ever bothered to alert NATO that some of their agents were exposed? Judging by the ease Silva killed some of the agents, I gather not. I also found Silva's plans regarding his revenge against "M" rather convoluted. From what I gathered, he wanted to humiliate her before he can kill her. If it was that easy for him to bomb MI-6, why did he have to resort to allowing himself to be captured by Bond, in order to get close enough to kill her? He could have flown to the U.K. and killed before Bond or anyone else was able to guess he was behind the debacles that dogged "M" in the movie. And how did he know she would be appearing before a public inquiry on the very day he busted out of MI-6's new quarters?
I also found Bond's efforts to save "M" very questionable. One, how did Silva managed to track Bond and "M" to the former's Scottish estate so easily? Were Bond and "M" wearing tracking devices? Did Silva use their cell phones? How? And if Bond had expected Silva to track them, why on earth did he not recruit back up to help him? If Silva had men to help attack "M" at the public inquiry, surely Bond must have realized that the former MI-6 agent would have help in Scotland. Instead, Bond relied upon the aging Kincade. I do not know who to charge with incompetence - the Bond character or the writers that created this scenario. Speaking of Skyfall, the sequence there featured two graves with the names of Bond's parents, Andrew and Monique Bond. One might ask "what is wrong with that?" This would have been fine . . . if Purvis, Wade and screenwriter Paul Haggis had not re-written Bond's past in 2006's "CASINO ROYALE". In that particular movie, Tresury agent Vesper Lynd accurately surmised that Bond was a middle-class or working-class orphan, whose education had been financed by a wealthy benefactor. In "SKYFALL", the writers used Bond's literary background. In other words, his father came from the Scottish landed gentry and his mother, from Switzerland. So . . . what happened to the background established in "CASINO ROYALE"? Did EON Productions rebooted the franchise for a second time, during Craig's tenure? If so, I find this very sloppy on the writers' part.
Before "SKYFALL" was released in U.S. movie theaters, I came across a few articles on the Internet, claiming that the movie might be less sexist than the previous Bond films. They cited the expanded role of "M" as an example of this more politically correct portrayal. After seeing "SKYFALL", I realized that this opinion of a more feminist friendly movie is a joke. This movie has set the portrayal of female characters in the Bond franchise back at least forty to fifty years . . . back to characters such as Honey Ryder, Jill and Tilly Masterson, Tiffany Case, Solitaire, Andrea Anders and Mary Goodnight. Here is a look at the four female characters featured in this movie:
*Clair Dowar MP - Helen McCrory portrayed the Member of Parliament who led the inquiry into "M"'s leadership of MI-6. It was bad enough that McCrory portrayed the character as a screeching harpy. But during the inquiry, she was interrupted by Gareth Mallory, who "suggested" in a patronizing manner that she cease her rants and allow "M" to talk. And she did! Why on earth did the screenwriters allowed Mallory to get away with such behavior to a MP? The script should have allowed Dowar to order Mallory to shut his hole and continue her rant, before allowing "M" to speak. But no. . . the all knowning male, Mallory, is allowed to shut her up in a very patronizing manner.
*Sévérine - Bérénice Marlohe, who portrayed Raoul Silva's mistress, claimed she was inspired by Famke Janssen's portrayal of "GOLDENEYE" villainess Xenia Onatopp. Honestly, I do not see the resemblance. Onatopp was a badass and slightly psychotic former fighter pilot and killer. Marlohe's Sévérine simply struck me as a world weary woman who turned out to be nothing more than a bed warmer for Bond and a long time sex toy and tool for Silva. One, she barely lasted longer than a half hour in the film. Two, Bond had sex with her, despite guessing that she used to be a part of Asia's child sex trade. Even worse, he failed to consider that sex with her would endanger her life. But he screwed her anyway in a rather . . . tasteless scene and Silva ended up shooting her like a dog. In the end, I realized that Sévérine reminded me of all those female Bond sacrificial lambs, whom Bond got to screw before they got bumped off. Marlohe was really wasted in this movie.
*Eve Moneypenny - Poor Naomie Harris. I realize that as the new Miss Moneypenny, she will have a job with the Bond franchise, as long as Craig continues to portray 007. But honestly, the screenwriters really screwed her in this film. Are audiences really supposed to believe that her character was unsuited to be a field agent, after the debacle in Istanbul? After all, she told "M" that she did not have a clean shot, before the latter ordered her to take it. Yet, upon Eve's reunion with Bond in London, he tries to undermine her self-esteem by claiming she was unsuited for such a role. And then . . . what happens? Eve is assigned to assist Bond in Macau and ends up saving his life. Later, she held herself well during Silva's attack against "M" at the public inquiry. Yet, near the end of the film, she informs Bond that he was right and decided to leave the field and become a secretary. A fucking secretary? This is how EON Productions set up Moneypenny for the Craig tenure? Not once did the film ever really indicated that Moneypenny had any difficulty over what happened in Istanbul. I felt really insulted after that last scene between Bond and Moneypenny.
*"M" - "SKYFALL" was supposed to be Judi Dench's swan song in the role of Head of MI-6, after seventeen years. And this was EON Productions' idea of a send off for Dench? Transforming her character into an incompetent boob? They had her character making mistakes left and right. Even worse, they reduced this "strong woman" into a useless and helpless female, who needed Mallory to come to her defense during MP Dowar's rant against her and Bond to save her from Silva. And yet . . . if she was really that incompetent, how is it that she was the only one who figured out that a former MI-6 was behind their troubles? If the portrayal of "M" was supposed to be an example of a proper female hero, EON Productions can keep it.
There were other aspects of "SKYFALL" that left me feeling disappointed. I am a great admirer of Adele as a singer. But honestly? I have no memories of the movie's theme song performed by her. The song simply went into one ear and out of the other. I also noticed that certain moments in the film showcased Craig posing in a standing position. In other words, he usually stood in one spot - whether at the bow of the boat delivering him to the Macau casino, next to Sévérine at the bow of Silva's yacht, on a hill overlooking his family's estate or on the rooftop overlooking the London skyline - feet apart and well dressed. Here is an example of that pose:
Before the movie ended, I could not tell whether I was watching a James Bond action film or a photo spread from a "GQ" magazine.
Ah . . . EON Productions. You really disappointed me this time. I had bought all of the claptrap about this being one of the best James Bond movies in years. Looking back, I now realize that Barbara Broccoli and Michael G. Wilson had overreacted to some of the negative press over "QUANTUM OF SOLACE", which I actually enjoyed despite its flaws. The fans could not deal with a dark and grim follow-up to "CASINO ROYALE", and the two producers reacted by delivering a movie that could not make up its mind on whether it was a grim espionage tale or a typical Bond fantasy adventure. It tried to be both and failed in the end . . . at least for me.
