"BATTLESHIP" (2012) Review

"BATTLESHIP" (2012) Review

Several years ago, the toy company Hasbro made a deal with Universal Pictures to produce and release a series of movies based upon their games and toys. The first movie to emerge from this deal turned out to be the 2009 movie, "G.I. JOE" THE RISE OF COBRA". Recently, another movie emerged from this deal, namely an alien invasion tale called "BATTLESHIP".

Named after the popular board game, "BATTLESHIP" told the story of a fleet of U.S. and Japan Navy ships forced to do battle with an advanced group of invading aliens. The story began in 2005, when NASA discovers an extrasolar planet with conditions similar to Earth. The space agency transmits a powerful signal from a communications array in Hawaii. Also, an undisciplined slacker named Alex Hopper tries to impress a woman by getting her a chicken burrito by breaking into a convenience store. The woman in question is Samantha Shane, the daughter of the U.S. Navy Pacific Fleet commander Admiral Terrance Shane, who is the superior of Commander Stone Hopper, Alex's older brother. After Alex is arrested, an infuriated Stone forces Alex to join the Navy.

Seven years later, Alex is a lieutenant and the Tactical Action Officer aboard the destroyer, U.S.S. John Paul Jones, while Stone is the commanding officer of U.S.S. Sampson. Alex is still dating Samantha and wants to marry her, but is afraid to ask her father for permission. During the opening ceremony for the RIMPAC naval exercises, Alex clashes with Japanese officer Captain Nagata. This incident proves to be the latest in a string of incidents that could result in the end of his Navy career. Meanwhile, Samantha, who is a physical therapist, accompanies retired Army veteran and amputee Mick Canales on a hike to help him adapt to his prosthetic legs. However, the arrival of five alien ships places Alex and Samantha's problems on the back burner, when the U.S. Navy and forces from the Pacific Rim nations to deal with the alien invading force, after it places a force field around the Hawaiian Islands.

When I first saw the trailer for "BATTLESHIP", I found myself wondering if Universal Pictures and Hasbro came up with the idea of a movie about the U.S. Navy battling aliens, from the naval warfare service. And I found myself wondering if the Navy wanted their own alien invasion movie, following the success of last year's "BATTLE: LOS ANGELES", which was about U.S. Marines fighting aliens. However, production for "BATTLESHIP" began some two years ago; so I nixed that idea. Whoever came up with the idea for "BATTLESHIP" . . . I wish that he or she never had in the first place.

There were aspects of "BATTLESHIP" that I liked. I thought it had a solid cast. Taylor Kitsch was very effective as Alex Hopper, who developed from an undisciplined slacker to a responsible and resourceful naval officer. He also had good chemistry with singer Rihanna, who portrayed a weapons specialist under Hopper's command; and Alexander Skarsgård, who portrayed Alex's uber disciplined older brother, Stone. But I was especially impressed with Kitsch's chemistry with Tadanobu Asano, who portrayed Japanese naval officer, Captain Nagata. Both Kitsch and Asano did a great job in developing the relationship between the two men. I was also impressed by Tobias A. Schliessler's breathtaking photography of the Hawaiian Islands and the nearby Pacific Ocean. And I was also impressed by the visual effects team led by Akemi Abe. Although I found the aliens themselves a little too mechanical, I must admit that visually, they were effectively frightening.

But when all has been said and done in the end, I must admit that I did not like "BATTLESHIP". Not one damn bit. Well . . . at least most of it. I feel that it was one of the most over-the-top action movies I have ever seen. Even worse, I got the feeling that Peter Berg, who has proven to be a solid director in the past, was trying to channel Michael Bay and the latter's TRANSFORMER movies. And it just did not work. It is bad enough that I am not a fan of the TRANSFORMER franchise. For me, it is like watching a science-fiction version of the TWILIGHT films. But that a decent director like Berg felt he had to lower himself to that level . . . dear God! Why? What director in his or her right mind want to become a second-rate Michael Bay?

So . . . what was it about "BATTLESHIP" that I disliked? After watching this film, I realized that a movie about an alien invasion set aboard naval ships is not very effective. The aliens in this movie limited themselves to naval ships and a communication array in the hills above Honolulu, Hawaii. Very limiting. And how on earth did a character like Alex Hopper lasted seven years in the U.S. Navy? Apparently, seven years of military service had done nothing to curb his undisciplined personality. It took an alien invasion to get him in line. Really? Give me a break. I bet that a character like Alex would not even last during officer training school, let alone seven years in the Navy. How on earth did a guy who had been arrested for breaking into a convenience store ended up as a naval officer in the first place? Guys like Alex would have ended up as an enlisted man. 

And yes, I found some of the performances rather mediocre - especially from the inexperienced Gregory Gadson, who was a former U.S. Army Colonel amputee; and actor Jesse Plemons, who came off as a second-rate Matt Damon, "the early years".  And Liam Neeson proved to be wasted in this film, due to his appearances in the movie's first 30 minutes and last 10 minutes. But what proved to be the last straw for me was the initial encounter between the survivors of the destroyed U.S.S. John Paul Jones and a group of World War II veterans aboard the museum ship U.S.S. Missouri. This scene was so ridiculous that it took me at least five minutes to stop rolling my eyes in disgust.

I wish I could say that I liked "BATTLESHIP". But I would be lying through my teeth. It had certain aspects that I found . . . admirable, including a strong screen chemistry between leading man Taylor Kitsch and Tadanobu Asano. In the end, "BATTLESHIP" made director Peter Berg seem like a second-rate Michael Bay. And you know what? That is not good for a solid director like Berg.